Dad with my brother Jack
Dad was tall (6′ 3″), handsome and difficult to know.
I never heard him talk about himself–but then I probably never asked him.
He had a raffish mustache, grown just before the Second World War, which prompted mention of David Niven and Errol Flynn.
He laughed easily–which revealed his devastating smile.
We’d egg him on to tell his favorite joke–about a soldier on his way to Aden in the war who started his journey in the north of England on a troop train heading south.
The compartment was sealed and the journey was non-stop–there was no access to a toilet.
By the time he got to Portsmouth he was desperate.
Going up the ship’s gangplank he shouts to a sailor, “Where the nearest toilet, mate?”.
“Portside!” came the reply.
Then we’d all groan–and repeat the punch line with him:
“COR BLIMEY–DON’T WE STOP AT GIBRALTAR!”
(The soldier thought he’d said Port Said in Egypt.)
He was good at maths and loved music; he played the ukelele and piano.
He’d stand in the living room conducting classical pieces playing on the gramophone with huge commitment and knowledge–his version of the “air guitar”, I suppose.
The gramophone was his pride and joy–and was state-of-the-art then in the fifties; we had no TV.
Anthony Gerald Ellis was born 4th November 1915.
He would have been a 100 this year.
“Tony” was adopted by my grandmother, who’d been widowed in 1912 at age 40.
He grew up in Hampstead Garden Suburb in north London with his sister, Mary–also adopted, but not a blood relative.
They fell into the butter dish!
My grandmother came from a middle-class Birmingham family. Her brother was head of the Civil Service. She married into a family of wealthy Leicester coal merchants.
They lived modestly, but photos from Mary and Tony’s youth show them thriving.
He went to private schools and always gave me the impression of being bright (he completed the Guardian cryptic crossword every day)–but there was a diffidence about him that made me think he’d never fulfilled his dreams.
Perhaps that diffidence had its origins in his adoption–not knowing where he came from, never feeling completely comfortable in his skin.
Perhaps he’d wanted to be a doctor or a musician–but the war got in the way.
He married my mother, Molly, in April 1938.
I was born in 1942. The the commitment to a growing family meant he had to stick to his day job as an administrator with British Railways.
He was a good and present “dad” who loved to be on the touchline at school football matches and in the audience at first nights.
He gave me an appreciation of music, an understanding of right and wrong and the obligation of doing things to the best of one’s ability.
He was firm, but not stern and never stuffy.
In 1944 he’d spent a year in America training to be a fighter pilot in Arizona.
He came back with an enduring love of the United States and its people and culture. He received Arizona Highways magazine for years. He enjoyed American country music and Broadway musicals. Roy Acuff and Jimmy Rogers often featured on the gramophone along with South Pacific and My Fair Lady.
He was outward-looking and open-minded–and by example encouraged these qualities in his three sons (two of whom married Americans; my late brother Peter settling in Los Angeles).
He took advantage of concessionary rail tickets to take the family to Europe on holiday and instill in us a love (rather than a fear) of “a world elsewhere”.
With brothers Peter and Jack (a babe in arms) and me (age 13) in 1955. Dad was 40.
In his mid-sixties, he lost an eye to cancer and wore his eye patch with characteristic élan! Sadly the disease moved to his liver and he died in November 1983 at age 68.
With my brother, Jack
He’s buried in the churchyard at Brill–the Buckinghamshire village where he and my mother spent their final years.
Thinking of you, Dad–who never knew your own father–on this Father’s Day.
Robin Ellis 
Beautiful tribute, Robin.
What a wonderful tribute to your dad robin and a lovely insight into his interesting life. My grandmother would have been 100 years old today, she died just short of her big birthday. Family are out roots.
Carol nolan
Thank you so much for this posting, Robin. I miss my father…you made me smile….happy father’s day to all daddy’s out there..hugs
Thank you for sharing the story of this beautiful man and what reads like a beautiful childhood under the loving guidance of your father.
Warm Regards,
Fiona Cortland
Thank you for an eloquent and touching tribute to your father. Mine, too, would have been 100 this year, and was a veteran of the U.S. Army Air Corps (they still had biplanes when he joined in 1938). He spent 1941 to war’s end at Williams Field, outside Phoenix, Arizona, where pilots for allied countries were trained as well as men for our own 8th Air Force headed to the U.K.
Could be the same place, Alix!
Yes, it could. A genuine Nazi spy was captured on base in 1944, trying to steal one of the famous Norden bombsights.
Williams Air Force Base 🙂
I think it was called Fairfax Field, outside Phoenix.
Thank you. I was moved to celebrate my father too:
https://austenreveries.wordpress.com/2015/06/21/for-fathers-day/
He liked British novels and I like to think had he known of them, he would have read and enjoyed Graham’s Poldark novels very much.
I really enjoyed reading this description of your father, Robin. What an interesting man. Thanks for sharing your memories. x
Such a very beautiful and moving post. Thank you.for this heart-warming tribute.
Best wishes from Tina
Thank you Robin for a lovely tribute to your Father on Fathers Day. I too had a most fantastic Father. He was in the RAF (second world war) and also a wonderful pianist. He always played the piano at my birthday parties much to the delight of my friends. Great fun when playing pass the parcel. I have so many happy memories of all the many things he taught me with so much love. A special memory was taking me and Mom to Cornwall all those years ago so that I could see where Poldark was filmed. To me he was the best Dad and Grandpa to our Daughter Scarlett, who also has a good and loving Father. How lucky are we to have had and known such truly excellent Fathers.
Loved the lovely and affectionate post on your father, brings memories of my father to mind. Thank you , Victoria Gough.
Thank you for sharing your Dad’s story. I lost my Dad to cancer when he was 68 too. Remembering him fondly today.
That’s so interesting, thanks for sharing it with us, and yes, your father was a very, very, handsome man, (nearly as handsome as his eldest son).
Robin what a beautiful tribute to your father, I am sure he was very proud of his three sons as they are of him. My own father wasn’t as lucky his parents were both dead by the age of six and he and his sister were spit up and sent to different members of both sides of the family neither had happy childhoods.Dad joined the army and spent many years in India until the war broke out. It was there on a beach call Normandy that he meet what turned out to be his sister’s husband, they both thought that the other was dead, so you see Robin some good did come out of that horror. Dad saved uncle Albert’s live But like you say I can remember curling up as a child on his knee and listening to the radio, he loved classical music and jazz as I do, I think it was radio 3 that he always had on. He died when I was eight years old but I can remember being with him.
Thank you for sharing your loving thoughts of a very happy family. and reminding me of mine .
Thank you too, Elaine.
Some lovely personal pictures lovely of you to share them with us Robin , thank you
Mr. Ellis:
Coming in and seeing your post on your father sure brought memories to me on mine and also on my role within my family. Thank you. It’s a great day to connect with all that it entails.
Hi Robin
Thank you for sharing. Family are everything. Nice to see you at the age if 13.
Did all the girls run after you just as they were to do years later when you became the dashing Poldark ?
I am cheeky 🙂
Have a lovely week.
I spent last 19th March – our Father’s Day in Italy – for the first time without my father. This time there was no reason to buy “Bignè di San Giuseppe” that he loved (he was a big eater as he had suffered real hunger in North of Italy during the Second World War and he put up weight little by little thanks to my mother’s cooking after marriage). He lost his father when 10 years old seeing him be taken away home from the Yugoslavian partisans and never seeing him back, on 25th April 1945, the exact date of the End of the War in Italy. He was not inclined to celebrate this anniversary for his private reasons and that event obsessed him his whole life. He was a militar officer, too. I could not talk to him without quarrelling or having passionate discussions, but I understand him and love him the way he was. He was a good man and a good father and the people I meet who knew him still praise him and remind me how much I look like him. We were the same, we were so different. Nothwithstanding I was his joy as you, Robin was, I am sure, your father’s joy. W i papà!
Thank you, Paola, for this memory.
Such a lovely tribute to your father Robin.
My own Dad also is a lover of music. It has been a huge part of his life but the war changed his direction. He had a wonderful bass baritone voice and won many tournaments. He has passed on his love of music and in some cases his gift of music to his children and grandchildren. My husband says its like living with the Von Trapps when we’re all together !!! Dad is now 92yrs old. Still lives very independently but struggles with heart issues and leukaemia After my mum died I began to talk to Dad about his life. He is a D Day veteran and hearing of his experiences ……..not just in Normandy has been an enriching time for us both.
Every girl thinks her Dad is a hero and I’m no exception. I’m off soon to have dinner with him along with his grandchildren and he will be in his happiest element. Precious men ….. great Dads. Ros
How lovely for you he is still with us.
Beautiful. Good job!
Thanks Jill-hi! Poldark 2 airs tonight on Masterpiece
We all have a story. . .you made his come alive!
What a lovely tribute, Robin! So sad how the war interrupted everyone’s lives!!My dad’s number got mixed up somehow with another young man’s in town, and he just MISSED being called up. (Though this was ’49, I think.) By the time he was due, he had gotten married to his childhood sweetheart–his only goal in life since he was 8, lol! –and they were skipping married men. But my father-in-law was all over Europe, while his young bride waited & worried about him. It was very hard on her.
Thanks for sharing.
Why do we fully appreciate our fathers, and regret all the conversations we never had with them, only when we catch up to them in age?
In any case, Robin, nicely done.
Thanks Bob.
Thank you for sharing these wonderful details and photos of your dad.
I cannot believe how much your brother Jack looks like your Dad, its uncanny. So lovely to share your intimate family memories and a great tribute to your father.RegardsVicki
Date: Sun, 21 Jun 2015 13:37:33 +0000 To: alexberry2@hotmail.co.uk
Buona sera sig Ellis
mi scusi ma non scrivo in inglese, mi chiamo Fernanda sono una sua blogger da poco tempo. L’ ho sempre ammirata come attore e per la sua particolare bellezza.Leggendo il suo post volevo dirle che la ammiro per aver condiviso i suoi sentimenti e la sua vita privata. Le sono vicina nella sua dolce memoria, fortunatamente io ho ancora i miei genitori e papà compirà 80 anni a novembre , anche se stà lottando contro un cancro al polmone.
Le auguro di camminare sempre nel suo ricordo e sicuramente Anthony Gerald Ellis è stato un bravissimo padre se lei è cresciuto con questi valori.
Grazie ancora Robin
Fernanda
Grazie a lei, Fernanda!
Robin, Thank you for your lovely tribute to your father. I also lost my Dad when he was young (56) and reading your story brought back wonderful memories!
Here’s to your father today, Robin! He sounds like a wonderful man and in so many ways the apple didn’t fall far from the tree. Thank you for sharing these sweet memories.
Thank you Robin for sharing the interesting exposé of your Dad . I sensed your love for him and that you miss him. My Dad will be 105 on July 5 th. He lives with my mother who is 97 in their own home. Although frail and with poor mobility , Dad is still of sound mind , has a wonderful sense of humour , and remains a huge admirer of you ( as Ross Poldark!!). He takes no medication other than I Zoloft tablet daily. He suffered bouts of depression all of his life and l always felt that , like your Dad, perhaps his ambitions were never realised. At age 85 he was prescribed Zoloft , which has helped enormously. My siblings and I have not got the heart to put our parents into a nursing home – my mother has mild dementia and they would be separated. Hence , with the help of Carers , we pull together on a rostered basis in an endeavour to keep them together in their own home for as long as possible. They will have been married for 74 years on July 9 th. They continue to take an interest in local and world affairs and their sense of empathy for others is strong. They do not ever speak of Death , other than in humorous tones . I wish that your beloved Dad had lived longer – 68 is far too young ! Best wishes and please keep on writing ! Helen Wallwork. Toowoomba , Queensland. Australia.
Thanks Helen for this inspiring story. Please wish your parents Happy Anniversary on the 9th July and your father many happy returns on the 5th.
My father’s brother had heart & diabetes issues, and his wife had Alzheimer’s. They faced the same problem of separation if they went from assisted living to a nursing home. They approached their daughter about taking them in and taking care of them, giving her the money that would have gone to the two nursing homes.
Your parents sound like wonderful people. Good for you and your siblings, pulling together to rotate assistance with the carers, so that there is less chance of burnout. I’m guessing that you all live reasonably close to each other.
Beautiful tribute! And we catch a glimpse of what your childhood was like!! Looking forward to Poldark tonight, but I can’t imagine it will be as good as the last one.
This was lovely, Robin. My own dear Dad died exactly a month ago today, so Father’s Day has been poignant for his 3 ‘girls’ this year. Oh how we are missing him. I still can’t bring myself to talk about him in the past tense, although I must begin sometime. I will visit your father’s grave when I’m in Brill next (we live very near) Sending all the best to you both x
Sorry to hear of your loss, Rachel–and very recent.
A beautiful memoir….Thank you for sharing….
The new Poldark series begins here tonight. Will watch but know it cannot compare to your Ross and the original Demelza! Cheers, Barbara Boling Oxford, Mississippi
Sent from my iPhone Barbara Boling
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What wonderful thoughts of your Dad. Mine was a year older than yours, He was orphaned at 5 in Toronto. Self made and a labor activist with Walter Ruther in the 40’s in Detroit. Widowed in the 50’s and both mom and dad to my brother and me. A wonderful grandfather and a sweetheart till the age of 87. Miss him greatly. They sure made great Dads back then, We were so lucky. Thanks for sharing. Can see where you got your great looks.Have my wine chilling and less then two hours for “Poldark”. Nice that all the articles about the show are mentioning your role it!
I’ve been thinking of you today with the premier of Poldark here in the US tonight. And with these pictures we know how handsome Joshua Poldark must have been. Very touching tribute to your dad.
I’m researching my family tree and writing little snippets about ancestors I’ve found. This reminds me I need to write something about the one who was my dad. He’s been gone since 1989 (he also had cancer) and there are over a dozen grandkids, great grandkids and nieces and nephews who never knew him.
Thanks for sharing a bit of your dad with us today.
Jan
Very touching. He was blessed to have a son like you. xo…rachel
Date: Sun, 21 Jun 2015 13:37:28 +0000 To: racheltourre@msn.com
You have your mother’s smile, but your father has quite the charming smile as well. I think I see your mother’s features in your face more than your father’s, but we only have a few photos, rather than your many memories. I envy Britons who are so close to other countries, and can easily travel there.
I wish my father had resembled yours more, in behaviour and stability. Oddly enough, he was in the 8th Army Air Corps, stationed in England, as a tailgunner in a B24. I have no idea if he trained in AZ, but I don’t recall him ever saying anything about a location for training. So odd, parallels found from disparate lives.
When we lived in Albuquerque NM for a couple of years in my youth, you could find AZ Highways all over, the way Sunset Magazine is found in California. I think I have a couple in a box of childhood memorabilia somewhere–one cover had Navajo art, the other an amazing painting of a trio of Navajo riding horses. Your father would have loved the Tony Hillerman novels about two Navajo detectives, if he’d lived long enough to read them (published after he died). My father in law and I were quite fond of them, me buying one copy, and the two of us reading and chatting after.
Very touching Robin. I felt tears because although I am an American woman I have ancestors great grandfather who came from Germany to Birmingham in late 1800’s and started the “lineage” although not royal. Thank you for that history and geez your dad was handsome so we see where you got it! Thanks for Poldark [which just debuted here last night in Longmont/Denver, CO]. For me, there will never be another Poldark [or Demelza] besides you. Thanks for the touching and revealing portrait of your father and family. Very human, very interesting. And yes, you should perhaps read Tony Hillerman if you have not.
Thanks, Stevie–I will check out Tony Hillerman.
Dear Robin,
What a lovely, loving tribute to your father. Weren’t we the lucky ones (the “baby-boomer” children of the post-war/50s England, having had such fantastic parents? They had been through so much – their own childhoods lived with the legacy of the First World War, then real austerity, and then their teenage years and twenties spent in selflessness during the Second World War, and yet they still managed to love us, feed us, house us, educate us and provide for us unstintingly. A truly Special Generation. Both of my lovely parents, like your own, and so many others now sadly gone, but NEVER forgotten with undying love, pride and gratitude. I so enjoyed reading what you managed to put into words. Well Done and Best Wishes.
Well said, Rosalyn.
Robin, What a loving and thoughtful tribute to your handsome father. I have great admiration and respect for his generation. They were so willing to serve and sacrifice for both family and country and most did it without complaining or thinking of self…they were selfless, they just got on with it. I posted about my father yesterday and said that, “Everyone has a father, not everyone has a dad” I was blessed to have both as were you. Considering the man your father became, despite not having a dad in his own life, I think is remarkable and you have every right to be proud of him. Who you are honors who he was as a father and dad.
Thanks for this, Victoria.
That was a lovely read Robin.( I think your brother is very like your Dad to look at.) My Dad died at 62 over 24 years ago , there isn’t a day goes by when I don’t think of him. I always felt safe with my Dad , he was my rock and comfort. If ever I felt down or unhappy about something he used to say ” What are you worried about ? You are a lucky girl. You’ve got your health, a good man who loves you and four beautiful children ……” He was right . He was from the north of England and his name was Arthur but he hated it, so when he met my Mum in London as sixteen year olds he told her his name was Rex ! It wasn’t until my Mum Joy and “Rex” went back up north to marry at the ripe age of eighteen that she realised the “Arthur” everyone was talking about was her Rex !! They went on to have five children .He was a lovely Dad, I’m glad you had one too .xxxxx
I know what he meant about Arthur! He sounds lovely.
It’s a fine tribute for your dad. He would have liked reading this and appreciated it.
Thanks, Heidi.
Gosh, I always love your stories about your dad, and family. You reminisce with such love and reverence.
On another note: Poldark episode 1 the remake aired last night in the States. I am hoping its “soul” will develop. Maybe I’m just spoiled.
Loved the story about your dad. A very handsome fellow. I too was fortunate to have a wonderful father.
Like Keri Green I watched “Poldark” last night with my husband. We both agree he did not capture the essence of Poldark like you did. I am glad I have your complete series. You were Poldark.
Early days, Virginia!
Robin that was lovely….l miss my dad too he was a mechanic in WW2 and spent time in the middle east….only he wasn’t my dad…he was my uncle…l was adopted and never knew until after he passed away but he was the only dad l knew and we shared a sense of humour…..your recollections are beautiful. Thank you xxxxx
Hi Robin…it is often said that a measure of a man’s success is how much he is loved by his children. My dad was born in 1914 and served in the US Army Air Corps. Like your dad he is no longer with us but on Father’s Day I came upon 1937 Dodge unrestored and identical to the one my dad owned when I was born. I like to think he put it there for me to see.
Will watch the new Poldark but I still have my DVD’s of your portrayal just in case.
Who’s to say nay to that, Pat!
So THAT’S where you get your movie star good looks!
Lovely memoir written with the perception of time and appreciation. My father lost an eye to cancer when he was in his 30’s and passed away at age 61 of a related cancer….too soon! He opted for the artificial eye instead of the patch, but he’d have made a glorious swashbuckler, too. Thank you for sharing your memory.
What a touching tribute, Mr Ellis! Fathers are always special persons. I lose mine many years ago, and I still miss him. Thank you for sharing the story of your wonderful dad.
lovely tribute
Such a handsome Dad!
Robin thanks for being so nice to your fans. I watched the first episode of the new Poldark and (although he can’t compete with you) I think he is doing an ok job,and I think his voice sounds a lot like yours. I miss “Ross’s” ponytail though 😋 I enjoyed reading about your father. Jimmie Rogers was actually born in my home town. We have a festival every year celebrating him
Thanks for this, Donna. Which town?
Robin, I live in Meridian, MS (way down South)
What a wonderful tribute. Thank you for sharing his story..
Warm and reminiscent words. Oh that my father could deserve such fond recall, although I do hold him in respect and am glad for his intrepidness, which I inherited. Your father sounded like someone to aspire to. Very glad I’ve come upon this site, remembering your performances well and looking forward to watching your cameo in the new Poldark.
Welcome Jacki and thank you.
Greetings from San Francisco, California Robin! We just celebrated our first father’s day with our newborn son – born a week ago on June 19th. Thanks for writing such a lovely and thoughtful piece about your father. Your fan from ‘merica. All the best and good eating! ~ Mai
Thanks, Mai and welcome to you and your newborn, of course!
A splendid tribute of love and admirwtion. Thank you for sharing, Robin! ❤️
What a wonderful tribute to your Father! Such an interesting family history…and I just love the photos….Wow! I live less than a block north of Williams Field Road and if you follow that road east about 8 miles you will find yourself at “Willy”..aka Williams Air Force Base! Can’t believe your Dad was here 🙂 My Dad served there …he also lost his eye to cancer and wore a patch for three months before he died… I see Arizona Highways magazines near the register every time I go to the grocery store, lol. Maybe nextime I’m out that way, I can take a few pictures of the base as it is now for you. Do you remember your Dad ever speaking of Chandler? Thanks for your blog, I so enjoy it!
Wow! Thanks for this Susan. I don’t remember him mentioning Chandler.
Even though the City of Mesa annexed Williams Air Force Base, many of the men serving there lived/spent time in my city, Chandler. So much fun wondering if my Dad/Grandad ever knew your Father….or at least ate at the same restaurants, lol 🙂
My father had a memorable time–loving the American way of life. He was lucky–so lucky. I wish i could talk to him about it now!